TTMO, thank goodness you didn’t get a New Year’s proposal from this guy. What a fraud. And the first red flag was that he was talking about marriage after just a few months.
I know whirlwind romances are possible. There are certainly many couples out there who got hitched after just a few months and are still madly in love. Good for them. But I consider those people the exceptions to the rule.
This guy was talking about marrying you before he really knew you. And that’s why you don’t have to feel too rejected. He never really knew what he had to lose. This was all about him – how he felt when he was around you, how he felt when he pursued someone else. That’s not the kind of partner you want to wind up with.
I know you know all of this. I know that my rant about this guy doesn’t help with the disappointment. Just consider that the most common question I’ve been getting this week is “Where can I meet someone nice on New Year’s?” It sort of makes the whole holiday thing less lonely once you realize that you’re sharing the experience with a bunch of people you haven’t even met yet. Meanwhile, some woman out there – the “lucky” lady who wound up with your ex – is probably going to spend tomorrow night wondering if the man by her side is going to do to her what he did to you. And she has every reason to worry.
Your last sentence gave me the chills a little. I know it seems to you that men move on faster than women, but I wouldn’t make that generalization. I think it’s less about gender and more about the way people process their emotions. He’s obviously a professional compartmentalizer (is that a word?), but that doesn’t mean his feelings won’t catch up with him. It doesn’t mean that he’s any less lonely than you are. Imagine not being able to really commit to anything because you’re too cowardly to be real with someone. That sounds pretty lonely to me.
Readers? Is it fair to say that men move on faster than women? Any words of support for TTMO? Should she have known better to begin with? Share.

– Meredith