You’ve tried to change his mind, but he’s not ready.

It also sounds like you’re in your grace period now – that if you wait another four yeas or so, you’ll have had almost a decade of fun as a long-term couple without childcare responsibilities.

That seems to be the compromise, right? More time now, less time before kids after marriage.

All of this works if you’re both want to get married eventually.

He does, right?

Has he told you he’s sure about that … just uncomfortable with the timing? I don’t know what to assume when you say he’s worried you’re rushing into these choices. If he’s not sure he wants to get married and have kids with you at all, he should speak up now, so you can make decisions accordingly.

As you talk about this, remember: none of these ages are magic. You might decide you want a kid at 31. You might decide 36 sounds great. Even if everyone is on board for everything, flexibility is great. Most people will tell you: life doesn’t always go according to plan, so get ready for surprises.

– Meredith

Readers? Any reason to wait until 30? How did you know you were ready? Any convincing to be done here? Is it fair to ask a significant other of five years to wait … another five years?

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