Super Bowl Game Day Dos and Don’ts
The casual Patriots fan is similar to the New Year’s resolution fitness fanatic. Both have good intentions, but it’s accepted that their interest will fade in two weeks or less, so they’re tolerated at best by more avid enthusiasts. That doesn’t make them any less frustrating when they are hogging a favorite treadmill or favorite seat in front of the TV.
Bandwagon jumpers may not be sure of game day etiquette when they’re watching the Super Bowl with serious fans. Don’t be the rookie in the room. Follow this guide to appear worldly about the foreign world of football (and its fans).
[fragment number=0]
Do: Wear Patriots apparel if you already own it. If you are going out to buy yourself an Edelmen jersey from the Patriots ProShop just to wear to the party, then you aren’t doing it right. Be comfortable, even if that means wearing something without the colors red, white, or blue.
Don’t: Be this guy. Not worth it.
[fragment number=1]
Do: Know the names of more players than Tom Brady and Rob Gronkowski. No, Aaron Hernandez doesn’t count.
Don’t: Memorize the roster. Ain’t nobody got time for that.
[fragment number=2]
Do: Get into the game! Yell at the TV. Cheer with the rest of the slightly intoxicated bargoers. That is the best part of the football experience: camaraderie and social drinking.
Don’t: Start throwing around football terminology. Leave the announcing to the announcers. Keep the commentary more along the lines of “that sneaky Julian Edelman pass!’’ or “Gronkowski’s cute butt!’’ rather than “check out the 4-3 scheme the Patriots are running on defense,’’ or “nice blocking on that reverse by the O-line!’’ Also avoid well-worn topics like each player’s salary or the price of game day tickets (life’s unfair, we get it).
[fragment number=3]
Do: Eat. A lot and without guilt.
Don’t: Order a salad, or complain about the calories of nachos. Eat your orange cheese, and drink your beer for the Patriots, and for America. Football hard or go home.
[fragment number=4]
Do: Be chatty. Remember, the Super Bowl is just a party where beer is sharing the spotlight with football. Many fans are not super concerned with the play by play of the entire game, so small talk here and there isn’t forbidden.
Don’t: Start talking about how excited you are for Katy Perry’s halftime performance if the referee is about to announce a ruling on the field. Katy can wait. Read the room.
[fragment number=5]
Do: Check out Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen’s Instagram posts throughout the day. We can almost guarantee she’ll post at least one picture of the family cheering for Dad.
Don’t: Spam your own Instagram or Snapchat story with pictures of yourself watching the game. Two minutes left in the fourth quarter is not the ideal time for a group selfie. Again: Read the room!
[fragment number=6]
Do: Be yourself. Own your casual fan status. If you are not an official member of #PatsNation, no one will judge you. People will judge you for pretending to be something you’re not—just like in real life.
Don’t: Insult someone’s fandom. If sports aren’t your thing, be cool. Just imagine how you’d feel if someone declared your love of Broadway musicals an unworthy passtime. And look out if someone insults Idina Menzel.
Master these skills—keep the Deflategate jokes to a minimum—and you’ll blend in at your Super Bowl party just fine.
To comment, please create a screen name in your profile
To comment, please verify your email address
Conversation
This discussion has ended. Please join elsewhere on Boston.com