For the secret New Kid On The Block in all of us
Years later, one man’s admission of his desire to be the sixth NKOTB. Just like every other guy in 1989.
“Get loose everybody ‘cuz we’re gonna do our thing…’’
The teenage boy looks in the mirror and holds his hand up to his ear, soliciting response from the thousands of adoring fans screaming just feet away from his Reebok high-top pumps.
“Cuz you know it ain’t over ’til the fat lady sings!’’
Then this happens.
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Oh, the 1980s: A magical decade that started with the fizzle of disco and the birth of Music Television. Donna Summer to Devo… “Macho Man’’ to Men at Work. Throughout 10 years of Jams-sized, parachute-pants glory, the decade gathered so much machismo that any boy turning 12 right in the middle of it was in a constant state of adrenaline-fueled merriment.
We had our Daniel Larusso crane kicks in 1985. We wanted to play beach volleyball — in jeans — with Maverick and Iceman in 1986.
We had Chuck Norris. Yes, we really had Chuck Norris… when he actually happened. We had bad-ass ninjas with real nunchucks and throwing stars. No teenage turtles required. And we had an Arnold Schwarzenegger sandwich of The Terminator and Predator with the lunch meat of Commando (and a side of Alyssa Milano to boot).
Oh yeah, we had Rocky IV.
“If he dies… he dies.’’ You just made a HUGE mistake, Mr. Drago.
Family photo from 1989… when I still rocked acid wash with no fear, and the New Kids changed the game for teenage boys everywhere.
And the music — OH THE MUSIC! Whether you started your jean jacket pin collection with Def Leppard’s Pyromania and Motley Crue’s Shout at the Devil — or you waited for Twisted Sister’s Stay Hungry and Quiet Riot’s Metal Health — there was so much heart-pounding, head-banging rocking to be done.
Hair was everywhere. It became the late 1980s, and the hottest live act of the summer was the Crue’s “Girls, Girls, Girls’’ tour featuring Warrant.
Machismo everywhere … mad, crazy machismo.
And then the New Kids On The Block happened.
It sent teenage girls running and screaming uncontrollably and same-aged boys to their bedroom behind closed doors to learn the New Kids dance.
You all know which one. And you still know how to do it:
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As a teenage boy I had no clue what to do with this New Kids phenomenon. I remember seeing the music video for “Please Don’t Go Girl’’ the first time as a freshman in high school. I was stunned. I don’t know if it was the sweet, beautiful falsetto of Joey McIntyre — or the fact Joey was exactly my age — but all I know is that I wanted to be him. Be them.
I wanted to run the city streets laughing with my boys, roam the subway then hit Wonderland for some rides, and do it all while serinading a beautiful girl in acid wash. The desire to be a member of this band was immediate.
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Then came the release of Hangin’ Tough in 1988 — which sent my dreams of becoming the sixth New Kid into inexplixable orbit. But my dreams remained locked tight behind the bedroom door. At the top of the stairs it’s your first door on the right, with the Joe Elliot poster on the front and the Heather Thomas hot tub poster on the back.
I may have remained hair metal fan on the outside, but I had become a boy band groupie on the inside.
My buddy Sean and I made a pact to have our high school senior yearbook ambitions read: “Become the sixth New Kid.’’ He came through, and I bailed in a panic. All I can do now is make up for that moment.
Today, as NKOTB prepares to bring the now-40-something ladies to a frenzy on the TD Garden stage… I want to let Sean know, my parents know… my wife and children to know:
I wish I was the sixth New Kid On The Block.
Step 5: “Don’t you know the time has arrived!’’
HOOH!
New Kids On The Block through the years:
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