I’m in a loving, healthy relationship with a wonderful man. He’s divorced and I’m separated and soon to be divorced. I have one child and he has two. We’ve been together for over a year. We spend every moment we can together, have met each other’s children, families, and friends, and from the moment we met, we were committed. He immediately talked about a future – marriage, family, etc.

But in recent months he told me he’s not sure when we can get married and be together. The problem is that we live over an hour away from each other. His ex has primary custody, so he can’t move his children, and for various reasons I can’t move my child. He feels that if he moves over an hour from his children, he will be abandoning them. He’d lose several overnights a month and would probably miss sports and other activities. He’s a dedicated, involved father, and the thought of that breaks his heart. But he says I’m the one, and that if he could, he’d marry me today.

I can tell this breaks his heart. It breaks mine, too. I want the whole package and don’t know if I can wait three or more years for something that may not happen. But if I break things off, I may never find a love like this again. I’m at a loss. We’ve talked about a halfway point, but that doesn’t help either one of us or our children. Thoughts?

– Whole package