A middle ground, eventually, could be the most literal spot on the map – living in the place that’s equidistant from your two communities. But what might be a better plan for now is calling one place home base, but doing extensive stays at a second location. Perhaps you could call your boyfriend’s parents’ house your primary address, but both of you could spend weekends with your parents and enjoy the community over there (when it’s COVID safe).

Or … maybe you’d be better off going back to what I assume was the old arrangement – driving to see your boyfriend, maybe on weekends, but living with your parents more of the time.

The big thing is that you can’t make future plans with this man without addressing how you’ll balance each other’s needs. When you talk about what life will look like years from now, does it involve both families? Is he open to leaving his family when you need to be around your people? All relationships involve compromise and some sacrifice, but right now it seems lopsided, and it sounds like you haven’t told him how much that bothers you.

Maybe it was too soon to move in. Regardless, it’s time to talk about all of it because you’re not supposed to have to find this middle ground on your own.

– Meredith

Readers? How do you compromise when two communities are equally important?