I just discovered that my boyfriend is married.

We met online and carried on a long-distance relationship for over a year. After the first couple of months I began to feel like something was not quite right. We texted non-stop daily and always late into the night, however, he didn’t do all of the normal things that boyfriends do, and none of the things that would make the distance more bearable (video dates, phone calls, romantic tokens, planning to end the distance).

I asked him repeatedly if he was married, and he assured me that he was just ridiculously busy with his career and very much single and dedicated to me. However, after a year of him only meeting me in my city, I told him I wanted to come to Boston. It never materialized, so I hired a PI and confirmed what I had suspected — he’s married. I ended my relationship with him immediately.

My question is, do I tell the wife? Part of me feels like she should know (if she doesn’t already), but the other part of me feels like there is no point in hurting yet another person over this. I want to take the high road, but at the same time, if I tell on him, maybe there won’t be another heartbroken gal later down the road in some other city going through the same thing I went through. Do I tell or not?

– He’s Married