Hi Meredith,

I recently downloaded the app Tinder, mostly for laughs, but was surprised when I was contacted right off the bat by a guy who wanted to meet up for coffee. He wasn’t pushy at all and none of his comments were lewd — he even wanted to meet me despite the very non-descriptive photos I used on the app — so despite refusing to meet him initially, we texted for a few days and made plans.

This guy is a member of a decently well-known band. He was getting ready to leave for a two-month world tour just as we began talking, and he kept canceling our plans because he was busy with practice, recording, and so on. Finally, I agreed to go to one of his shows in my area because I knew if I didn’t, we wouldn’t meet before he left. At the show I was surprised not only to be introduced to many of his very close friends, but also his drug addiction. Charming.

Despite the mess that was our initial meeting, I’m still very interested in getting to know him. He’s away with his band for two months, returning for two weeks, and then leaving for another month and a half. I have not heard from him save two or three indiscriminate text messages since our initial meeting, though he did say he would get in touch when he got back. What do I do? Should I try to reach out to him, or expect something from him? He seems unreliable and perhaps even frightening, but that only makes me want him more.

Thanks.

– Music Man, Location Unknown