Dear Meredith,

I am 28 years old and have been single for just over a year and a half. During this time, I have been on countless dates. It is quite easy for me to meet men, but I have difficulty meeting anyone I want to see past a third date. Six weeks ago I met a man who we will call Matt. Matt is 29 and going through a divorce. He and I have a lot of fun together and enjoy a lot of the same things. In the first week, we saw each other five times. I know this is a bit excessive, especially since we had just met, but it felt natural and I wasn’t running for the hills like I usually am when things move too quickly. Even though we were moving fast as far as seeing each other a lot, we were not moving quickly in the bedroom. We waited about three and a half weeks to sleep together, which was probably around date number nine. The sex was not good. Since then, we have slept together more times and it has not improved.

I keep hoping it will get better with time, but now it is starting to effect how I am with him when we are out together. I find myself not wanting to hold his hand, kiss him, or even just rest my hand on his leg. Before sleeping together, I was attracted to him, but that has definitely been fading fast. I am thinking he may just not have much experience sexually. He moved out of the home he shared with his wife nine months ago and has not slept with anyone but me since then. Sex is very important to me and I am not sure this is something I can just sweep under the rug.

So, my question is, do I end it with Matt or stick it out and hope he will suddenly have some porn star moves he’s been holding back on me?

– Bored in the Bedroom in Back Bay