Hi Meredith,

I am 24 and recently moved to DC for a new job. Taking the job required me to move away from my wonderful boyfriend. We’ve been together for about a year, and we’re really happy and supportive of each other. We decided to try long-distance, and even though it’s been hard, it’s totally worth it because I love him like crazy.

Some background: I did a six-month fellowship in another city last year, and during my time there, I met a guy (not my current boyfriend) and we started dating. Things were pretty serious, to the point where he drove back to Boston with me when my fellowship ended. After trying to make it work long-distance for a little bit, it didn’t work out. Long story short, he got really needy and it got to be too much.

We haven’t really talked since we broke up, because I felt like if we did, he would get the wrong idea. The last time we talked was in March when he called me and I mentioned I was looking at some jobs in DC, and it turns out he lives there now. I soon realized that he might get the wrong idea from that too, so I called him back a day later and told him firmly that even if I DID move to the same area as him, there was no chance of us getting back together, ever. We haven’t spoken since, and I was proud of myself for closing the window and not keeping him on my hook.

So now here I am, in DC, where I know no one. It’s been really hard and lonely, but I’ve been going out with coworkers and doing some community activities to make it easier.

This past weekend I went out clubbing (not a normal thing for me) with some new friends, and there was a lot of drinking involved. I don’t usually get that drunk, but with all the stress I’ve been dealing with I decided it might be kind of fun to let loose with new people.

I was waiting for a cab when I decided, in my very drunken state, that it would be a good idea to call my ex. How, you ask? Yes, I had deleted the number, but I remembered it! I dialed the number but then realized I had nothing to say, so I just kept the phone ringing away from my face. I can’t remember who hung up; he probably thinks it was an accidental dial or something.
So as far as drunk dials go, it was probably the best possible situation. Still, I woke up the next morning feeling horrible, and I have vowed to never get that drunk again. I’m definitely going to be more careful in the future.

My question is: Should I tell my boyfriend about the drunk call? In all of my sober states, and even my buzzed state, I know I don’t want to talk to my ex. I want to be honest with my boyfriend because we tell each other everything. But I also don’t want him to worry about it when there is absolutely nothing to worry about. He knows about the ex living here, by the way, he just doesn’t like to talk about it because it bothers him. The most recent time I tried to bring it up (before I moved), he immediately changed the subject.

– Hungover, D.C.