Meredith,

I’m 20 (yes, only 20) and have been with my boyfriend for two and a half years. Our relationship was great when it started. I loved him right away. We go to different colleges and have been doing a long-distance relationship for two out of those two and a half years. I love him very much and when we are together I have so much fun and he always knows how to put a smile one my face. He isn’t a romantic guy and I blame most of that on his immaturity (he’s only 21). However, I am graduating in August and I have started to start to think about a future with him.

Our families have raised us completely opposite. His family is rather small, they don’t attend church, and they aren’t outdoorsy people. I, on the other hand, was practically raised outdoors — hunting, fishing, and camping with our rather large family. Our family gatherings seem to be more of a party as opposed to awkward social talk where people would rather play on their iPads (like his family does). I grew up with God fully in my life and I plan to raise my children that way. However, when I confronted him about this, he said he was not interested in going to church, and that is a huge turn-off for me.

I just keep having thoughts about whether he is right for me in the long run or if I’m just settling for what is comfortable. I love him with all of my heart, but will that love be enough to get over the fact that he isn’t who I imagined spending the rest of my life with?

Everyone who I have talked to who is happily married said that they never had doubts in their minds about their significant other. Yes, they had ups and downs, but the thought of “Is this person really right for me?” never crossed their minds, which makes me think that our love isn’t as strong as it used to be.

I love him so much and the thought of ending things with him brings tears to my eyes and so many questions to mind (What if I’m making a huge mistake? What will I do without him? How could I ever move on?). On the other hand, what if I wind up marrying him and then have these feelings again later? He is so good and so kind, and I just don’t know if we are truly meant to be. What should I do?

– Confused and Scared to Settle, Michigan