I have been married for just over 10 years to a woman I truly love. We have two happy children, I work full time, and she has been a stay-at-home mom for the past decade. About two years ago, we went to neighborhood party and she got drunk and was found making out with a friend of a friend in the backyard. She claims she doesn’t remember anything and I have done my best to forgive her. Over the last two years, she has become very secretive about where she goes (she has all day to do whatever she wants while the kids are in school), who she talks to (all electronics are locked), and she either no-shows or shows up late for the kids’ events. If I ask her anything about her whereabouts, I get either “what are you accusing me of” or the vanilla “errands.”

In addition to all of this, she has been “looking” for a job for the last two years. I use the term “looking” loosely as she doesn’t keep me updated on anything on that front either. She is still unemployed and I don’t see anything changing with that anytime soon. Do I keep silent or do I push the envelope to have more disclosure? My life is an open book – I work, come home, play with the kids, and try to make everyone happy. I am conflicted about whether I am being played or if I am just paranoid.

– Am I a sucker or a stalker