I want us to be able to enjoy getting married

Thursday | March 19, 2026

Love Letters Marriage

I want us to be able to enjoy getting married

Is there something on your mind about a relationship in your life? A friendship? A crush? A spouse? Send your own question. Help others wondering the same thing. Use the form – or email [email protected].

After 15 loving years, my now-fiancé proposed in December. A few weeks later, we found out he has an aortic aneurysm. More appointments and tests to come. It could be fatal, it could be surgery and a long recovery, it could be wait and see for a while.

We’re getting married in May. How do we stay focused on being present and connected and excited rather than sad and scared?

– Scared

I wish I had a easy answer to this question.

My only thought is: love each other – and yourselves.

No one is requiring you to be “present and connected” all the time. You don’t need to perform serenity when you’re not feeling it.

I understand why you want to separate these experiences in your brain – to keep the difficult emotions away from the wedding process – but some days you will find yourself sad, scared, connected, and excited, all at once. Hopefully there will be some interrupted moments of joy, but it’s OK if you’re feeling 1,000 things at the same time – even in the middle of your reception. That’s just life right now.

I do hope you have a good support system, whether it’s family, friends, support groups, therapists – whatever you need.

Congratulations on 15 years of love and care, by the way. What a beautiful thing.

– Meredith

Readers? How does one stay focused on joy in scary times?

Is there something on your mind about a relationship in your life? Or a relationship you wish you had in your life? Send your own question. Help others wondering the same thing. Use the form – or email [email protected].

Health 🖤 Marriage