Stay home. Rest. On occasion, push yourself to do a little more. That’s the happy medium.

Sometimes I can’t imagine doing an out-of-the-house thing until I get there, and then it’s not so bad. But it’s easier if I have a night of nothing before it happens.

That’s my first thought – to get more relaxation time. Easy, right? (I know, I know.) But really, when introvert-downtime turns into errands, cleaning, and a different kind of busy, it’s not a real reset. I hope you’re getting many hours to read a book, take a walk, and stare at a wall, if you like that kind of thing.  

If you’re worried that staying home will make you feel disconnected from your husband, well … don’t. Just tell him you want to stay in the loop and hear about his night – and that you’d also love a few nights for just the two of you. Maybe at the movies. Or a quiet restaurant. You can be out, but your social button will still be off.

This seems to be a letter about “the ‘pause” more than anything else. It’s weird to experience big changes when someone else – your longtime partner – feels the same as he did a few years ago.

But the changes don’t stop. From what I hear, some of that exhaustion goes away. You might be high-energy before you know it. Talk to a doctor about how this might look in a few months and years.