I Haven’t Met His Kids

Monday | November 2, 2015

Love Letters Divorce

I Haven’t Met His Kids

I have been seeing this wonderful man for a couple of months now. I have introduced him to my daughter (she is 12) and she really likes him. But I have never meet his kids. He has two – both in college. He says he is not ready for them to meet me yet – that the youngest will take it too hard.

I have been divorced for almost two years and he has for over four. The other day I went to his house for the very first time because he was sick and I wanted to bring him some cookies, and I texted him to let him know that I was there. He told me not to come in because his daughter was there. He ended up meeting me in the garage. What I want to know when is enough is enough. I never want to come between him and the kids, but I want to be included in his life, too.

– Feeling left out

I don’t have a problem with him waiting more than a few months to introduce you to his kids. Every family is different, and if he’s not ready, it’s good that he knows it.

I do think it’s a bit strange that you had never been to his house before the cookie drop-off. You seem to be taking next steps while he’s standing still.

You have to talk to him about what he wants from you, and whether he’s given any thought to his pace. If his kids are living at home, you should ask how long he expects you to hide in the garage. If they’re away at college, you should find out when he plans to let you see where he lives.

There are too many questions here, and he’s the one with the answers. Before you give up on the whole thing, just ask him about his intentions.

Readers? Does the kid thing bother you? And the garage?

– Meredith

Family 🖤 Divorce

Featured Comment

u0022Bottom line – it’s ultimately up to each person in a relationship to decide when it’s appropriate to introduce the other to his/her family. Doesn’t really matter whether there is a divorce or whether there are kids (or their ages.) It’s up to the individual, without reproach.nnIf you don’t like it, you can leave.u0022 – Blistered-Toe

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