Oversharing happens to appeal to me more than small talk forever, but I understand. You want to know interesting information within reason – and at the right time.

The strangest thing, to me, is that they’re sharing intimate details that aren’t relevant to the conversation. Like, if I told you, right now, that I’m getting a colonoscopy next month. (I am! Everybody, ask your doctor if it’s time for yours, too!) 

You might not like that.

My point here is that some people are comforted by those who offer a lot of personal details up front. You’re not –so it makes sense that none of these relationships have progressed. I’m quite sure there are plenty of people out there who will start a courtship by talking about the weather and siblings, and move to more important topics when it feels right.

I think you’ve just had a random run of oversharers.

I do want to give them the benefit of the doubt, by the way, and assume there’s no malice in their game. Some people get nervous on first dates and say too much – or too little. Maybe they want to keep connecting before that date so they say anything they think might stick. It doesn’t always land.

Also, maybe that one person’s friend’s parent’s serious illness is weighing on them a lot. I can’t guess his tone, but maybe he was trying to show you he cares about the people in his life.

You don’t have to be into this. I’m just happy you’re getting from messages to first dates. Maybe that’s part of it, too. I get so many letters from people who match with others but never get to the next step, in person. Perhaps the people who are willing to go on an actual date are ready to get to know someone – and have plenty to say.

If the vibes are off, move on to the next. But if you’re not sure, try to keep it going and find out if the oversharing leads to something better.

– Meredith