Dear Meredith,

I’ve been close friends with this guy ever since we were young. We liked each other more than friends, but really hadn’t done anything about it until a few months ago when we we finally got together. It’s really unfortunate timing because we’re both heading to different colleges in a few weeks. We both agreed we’d break it off when we left for school, as neither of us are keen on having a long-distance relationship. We really want to stay close friends, and we thought ending the relationship before college would be best for that.

Last week, he told me that he wanted to end our exclusive relationship early, and that there wasn’t really a point to it if we’re just going to break up in September anyway. I totally understand that, but I’m still pretty hurt because I thought we would be together until we leave.

I’ve told him I want to be in our exclusive relationship until we leave but that I don’t want to force him if it’s not going to make him happy. I know this whole transition from high school to college is hard on a lot of couples – you probably get loads of letters about this topic – but I really don’t know what to do. My friends are telling me to break it off with him and not even stay friends, but even if we aren’t going to work out as a couple, I do want to maintain a friendship with him because he’s such a big part of my life. And even if he doesn’t want to be exclusive, I would still want to continue hooking up with him for the next few weeks, even if he gets with other girls. It sounds like a bad idea, but he’s kind of my first love and I don’t want to lose him. Please advise and thanks for your help!

– First Heartbreak