Single At 29

Monday | March 30, 2015

Love Letters Dating

Single At 29

Submit your letter to this form.

Meredith,

I’m 29 and single. In the past year it seems everyone around me has settled down. I don’t have as many friends to hang out with and it seems like everyone is hitting major milestones in life (marriage, house, baby). I feel like I missed the boat in terms of meeting someone at the right age. I’ve been doing my best to put myself out there. I’ve been online dating, joined a sports team, and go out as much as I can, but I haven’t been in a serious relationship in three years. Nothing seems to stick. I date someone for a month or so and they lose interest.

Obviously the common denominator is me. I’m not sure what I’m doing wrong. I don’t think I’m too picky. I’m an open-minded easygoing person. I worry that once I am in my 30s men will have even less interest.

– Lost

You missed the getting-everything-done-by-30 boat, but there are many boats to come. Men don’t turn into pumpkins when they hit 30. I promise that they’ll still be looking for open-minded, easygoing partners.

Twenty-nine (and every age that ends with nine) can mess with your head and cause you to make weird generalizations about the rest of your life. But really, 29 is no different than 31 or any other number. After about 25 or so, you and your friends will be in a constant cycle of life changes. You’ll go to one wave of weddings and then another. Try to remember that there’s no perfect age for any of this stuff.

Also, stop thinking of your three-year break as evidence of some sort of personal flaw. You’ve had plenty of dates over the years even though you haven’t found a life partner. That sounds pretty normal to me.

Readers? Anything off here? What about her friends? How about ages that end in nine?

– Meredith

Dating

Featured Comment

Have you tried suggesting to your married friends that you’re in search mode? They might have friends, or their spouses might have friends, that you haven’t met yet.

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