She’s In An Open Relationship

Wednesday | November 4, 2015

Love Letters Dating

She’s In An Open Relationship

Hi there,

I’ve been seeing this girl lately. We started as friends (with benefits) but have both developed feelings for each other. Now you think, “Great! Get together and be happy!” If that were possible, I wouldn’t be writing this.

You see, she’s in an open relationship. We both don’t know what to do. She wants to talk about it with her boyfriend (who lives on the other side of the country) and is afraid he will tell her not to see me anymore (which will be difficult, considering we are going to school together). I am sad because I know she will choose him, despite the fact that she’s given me hope. I’m also afraid to lose her. Maybe it would be better if I told her we should just be friends (which would also be hard), but I don’t know if I can do that.

– Confused

What does she plan to say to her boyfriend? That conversation is only relevant to you if she plans on breaking up with him.

It’s time to tell her that you want to date her exclusively – or not at all. If she says no, you have to cut her off. Your feelings and priorities have changed, and this casual relationship isn’t working anymore.

I know you’re afraid to lose her, but at the moment, you don’t have her. Once you bail, she’ll either realize that her primary relationship isn’t good enough, or she’ll let you go, which means the separation was for the best.

You shouldn’t have to deal with this couple’s drama. Walk away and let them figure it out on their own.

Readers? Should he give this time?

– Meredith

Dating

Featured Comment

u0022Open relationship, indeed. If you live that far from your BF that it only makes sense to also see other people, you need to let go of that relationship.nnMy guess would be that her relationship will implode and you will get your chance, LW. Bide your time.u0022 – shrtc8ke

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