Dear Meredith,

I really need some relationship advice. I’m 20 and my boyfriend is 18. We have been dating since high school and are approaching two and a half years. Luckily, I am going to college in my hometown, where my boyfriend, “Bill,” is finishing up high school. Bill plays football and is for sure going to play at the college level. I am so excited for him and have been supportive, but I’m pretty much freaking out.

Bill has no clue where he is going to go. He could be going to the college where I am, or he could be going to a college that is five states away. I love the school where I am and have no intention of switching, regardless of where he goes to play, but I don’t know what to do. I am lucky to see him maybe twice every two weeks because he is so busy, and for that reason, there has been a strain on our relationship. I feel like every long-term relationship goes through a point in time where they feel stuck and need a pick me up. What do I do?

I feel like sometimes I seem like a psycho about it, but I have kind of come to the conclusion that I need to back off and be secure in my relationship, because he constantly tells me that if we have made it this far, we don’t have anything to worry about. He says he loves me and that if he didn’t want to be with me, he wouldn’t. I believe him when he says these things, but backing off and being secure in a relationship is easier said than done. I was in a very abusive four-year relationship prior to dating Bill, and this has made me have severe trust issues, even though Bill hasn’t done anything to break my trust. I don’t want to freak him out by telling him that we need to talk about our future, but we really do. He is going through a really rough time right now with his family and school and trying to decide where he wants to play football, and the last thing I want to do is add stress onto the tons of stress he already has.

– HELP!!!!