I’ve been dating a guy once a week for about three weeks. He usually texts all throughout the day, all sorts of texts; happy things, stuff that upsets him about his job, questions about my day, naughty texts, etc. Initiation is probably about 60/40 me, or relatively equal. When we go out, it’s amazing. Like I’ve found someone who really, really gets me. And he’s said the same.

I was very happy with the way things were progressing. He’s a very introverted person who suffers from depression and migraines, so I know he has “off” days. I try to give him space, and was really excited when he invited me over to his house to watch a movie. A lot of our texting had become pretty sexual at this point, so I was pretty sure that would happen when I came over. And it did. Once at night, and again in the morning. We chatted a bit and then I hit the road. When I said goodbye he gave me a kiss, but flashed me an almost pitying look …still, I tried to ignore my gut. After all, we’d had sex like 10 minutes earlier, and after we did, he took me out back to show me the his pride and joy – a shed he’s building.

Later that day (five hrs later?) I texted him a funny reference to the movie we watched the previous night, and got no response. So around 9:30 that night, maybe 12 hours after I last saw him, I texted to say “I’ve noticed you haven’t been responding like you usually do, is everything OK? Just checking in to make sure you didn’t get trapped under a pile of wood while building your shed ;),” thinking maybe he had a migraine, or was depressed and might want to talk about it (as he has done before). I figured something was wrong but didn’t press him. It’s now been more than 24 hours since I sent that text, and there’s been dead silence on his end.

I don’t understand. Obviously, I’m not going to text him, at least for a week. But despite having only known this guy for about a month, we clicked really well, and I really really liked him – so I’m a mess. I’m worried that I did something wrong, or far worse, that I was simply used for sex. Which really would be surprising, since he was emotionally vulnerable after we had sex that night. In the morning, I could tell something was off, but it’s as if something went wrong during the 15 minutes between getting out of bed and into my car. Do I just give up and move on? It seems like maybe he is just really good at pretending to be vulnerable and open, while his end game was just to have sex and kick me to the curb. In sum: I feel totally feel used, and that is a terrible feeling.

So, Meredith … is he ghosting? Is there some way to correct the situation? If this is just the way he is, it’s pretty immature and he’s not someone I’d want to be with anyway. But he wasn’t like this at all until I left his place that morning. What’s going on? And should I text him again at some point again, like next week? If so, what should I say? Thanks.

– What went wrong?