Meredith, I fear that I am one of those women whose standards are too high. I always thought that I was just independent and not interested in dating as much as my friends, but recently I met a man who seemed like a character some teenage girl made up for her young adult romance novel. He was handsome, a CEO of a company, former athlete, talented musician, and known to be generous and kind. I was completely infatuated for about 10 hours before I discovered he was married. Of course he was. I let it go.

The problem is that those 10 hours were the only time I truly was interested in someone in the past five years. I have turned down good men because I wasn’t really “feeling it,” no matter how hard I tried. When I look back at the very small number of men I truly liked, they were all like him: admirably successful, handsome, and talented with good character. That’s what it takes to get my heart stirring, and even in my mind it’s a bit too much; I’m not even that well put together. Is this a problem? Do I have be amazed by someone to be attracted to them? How can I get my heart to be less picky?

– Suddenly Uncertain