Will We Get There When We Get There?

Monday | July 10, 2017

Love Letters Dating

Will We Get There When We Get There?

I recently graduated from college and have been in a relationship for more than two years. It’s now long-distance because we’re both from different states. We’ve always had the school year to fall back on since summers are busy, but now real life is setting in as it does.

He’s trying to get a position across the country and plans to do a lot of traveling. I’m just saving money at home and taking whatever work I can get. I don’t have any specific goals yet. It just gives me the time to overthink things.

There’s been no real talks of the future and what we have in mind. The basic gist of things is that “we’ll get there when we get there” because we don’t really know what’s going to happen or where we’ll be. I’m just wondering if I’m overthinking or if I should ask what we’re trying to do here and what he sees for us in the future.

– Waiting

The big question you should ask right now is whether you should attempt to be an exclusive couple while you’re in two different places. Long-distance relationships can work best when there’s some sort of light at the end of the tunnel. You guys have no light – no plan to be together – so it would be nice to have some freedom instead.

You probably don’t want to lobby for a breakup, but this is an excellent time to wake up every morning and think only of yourself. Without a faraway boyfriend, you can figure out what you want to do when you’ve saved enough money to leave home. You can make plans for your own travels. You can come up with some great goals.

The thing to remember is that he’s been talking about a possible future for the two of you, but he hasn’t said anything about the present. You have to prioritize the now as you decide what to do next.

– Meredith

Readers? Should they be together right now?

Dating Distance

Featured Comment

u0022My wife and I went to different colleges but we spent the summers together. I followed her to Boston where she went to graduate school. I found work in Boston and we’ve lived here ever since. Living together helped us to decide that we wanted to stay together.nnI recommend living with him and traveling with him. This will help you to decide if you want to stay together. You don’t have an established career so there’s no reason not to hit the road. You don’t have to spend a lot of money to travel.u0022 – Adamu002du002d-

Share Thoughts