He Won’t Let Go

Tuesday | July 19, 2016

Love Letters Breakups 🖤

He Won’t Let Go

I have a situation where my ex broke up with me months ago after two years. I was super in love with him, but he said he was expecting to feel more and wanted to date around. Of course I was heartbroken because I invested so much in him and understood him, even though he was older than me (he’s 38, I’m 28) and hadn’t had a lot of relationships. He told me he wanted to be friends and that there may be hope for us in the future.

Six months later, he is still treating me like he did when we were together with pet names and affection, but he’s talking to other girls and it’s makes me feel crazy. When I tell him how I feel and that I want to part ways, he insists I’m being ridiculous and continues to reach out to me even after I tell him I’m done. I’ve even told him to not call me until he wants something real and he still continues to reach out. What makes it harder is that I have to see him occasionally for school events. How do I handle this man so I can stop feeling heartbroken and move on to someone who will treat me better than this?

– Let Me Go

Let him know that you’re going to avoid his calls, mute or block his profiles, and that you’ll no longer be responding to emails. You require this space, and if he can’t respect that, he has no respect for you. Labeling your needs as ridiculous doesn’t change them. When you run into him at events, all you have to do is give him a polite nod like a grownup.

After you’ve done all of that blocking, let family and friends know that he’s out of the picture. He shouldn’t be invited to parties or included on emails. If he reaches out to them, they should ignore.

This man is doing his best to let you know that he’s still in control, and that whenever he wants you back, he has you. Maybe there had been hope for the future, but now it’s gone, right? The person who treats you this way is not the person who care for you and put your feelings first. He’s made it clear that it’s all about him.

– Meredith

Readers? Ridiculous?

Breakups 🖤

Featured Comment

Either he’s keeping you as a backup plan for when ‘dating around’ doesn’t pan out in his favor, which makes him a selfish narcissist, or he just likes having it all, which makes him a selfish megalomaniac. Or he doesn’t understand how what he’s doing is harmful, which makes him a moron. Whichever way you look at it, this dude’s toxic. Cut him off and start dating around yourself. You’re not even 30—there’s a lot out there for you, and none of it involves this guy.

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