I don’t believe in soul mates. I believe in excellent partners and meaningful experiences. 

You had a very meaningful experience, but it wasn’t supposed to last forever.

I’ve noticed – especially in this column – that it can be harder to get over a complicated, sometimes unhealthy relationship than an excellent one. Maybe that’s because people spend so much time working on problems that they feel an absence of that mission when the relationship ends.

It’s like they’re grieving the person, but also grieving the project of staying together. 

I can’t say that’s what you’re experiencing. But maybe? I do think you can focus on yourself right now, as opposed to dating. What if you were your own soul mate? (Sorry. Cheesy.) But what if you felt complete on your own for a bit and then thought about finding company that complements who you are?

I guess that means I do believe in soul mates a little. Like, in the self-help way that says “it was me all along!” You had an big, life-changing experience with your ex. You can have another with someone new, maybe for a lifetime. But the relationship you can count on – no matter what – is the one you already have.

You’re your own Gemini twin flame, I swear.

– Meredith

Readers? Do you believe in soul mates? Also, what’s your sign? Hoping we can have some Geminis speak to this.

What’s on your mind about breakups, love, exes, dating, friendship, falling in love, loss, crushes, marriage, etc.? Submit your letter by using the anonymous form, or email [email protected].