This sounds like a flag. Maybe red, maybe yellow.

It’s worth hearing her out. Does she have anything to say about her choices – and why she changed her mind? Are the compatibility issues no longer relevant?

To me, the biggest flag is her wanting to get back together. The timing of the breakup wasn’t great, but sometimes people can’t wait, especially after they’ve made a big decision. But she wasn’t even sure about this! You need to get an explanation so you can understand. 

I feel I should also mention … I have known people studying for big professional exams. Sometimes their relationships suffer because of the stress that comes with studying. I am not blaming the victim here, I swear, but I do wonder if the experience of supporting you through the test process might have been rough. Maybe she thought she couldn’t cut it as a partner. Perhaps she’s come back because the hard part is over.

Talk more and take time with your feelings. My guess is that the compatibility issues are still there, but only the two of you know it that’s true.

I am curious about why a person in your life is suggesting sabotage. If there’s even a part of you that feels it could be true, stay broken up. You don’t need that in your life.