His Mom Says He’ll Mature

Friday | July 1, 2016

Love Letters Breakups 🖤

His Mom Says He’ll Mature

Before the long weekend, help another young person (I see a running theme in the InBox lately). Enjoy the holiday and see you Tuesday.

Hey Meredith,

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half, and I have been happy enough throughout the relationship. He’s always been a little more immature than I am, and honestly he doesn’t know how to do a lot because his mom does everything for him. He’s 20 and I’m 19.

The other day I met some new people and had a great time hanging out with some older guys, and now I feel like I want to end it. His mom has been telling me for months to wait for him to mature. Should I keep waiting? Do you think it’s bad of me to end things just because I suddenly changed my mind? I thought we were going to stay together and get married, but now I really don’t want to stay with him. But he’s just the nicest guy, just immature and a little selfish. I guess I just need some reassurance and advice. This is my first real relationship.

– Time to break up?

It sounds like it’s time to get single. Not because those older guys will be better partners, but because you want to experience the dating scene and to see what life is like without your boyfriend. You love this guy because you share a history, but he’s not what you’re looking for right now. Maybe he’ll evolve into something else, but you can’t plan a life based on what he might become.

You’re allowed to change your mind, even if it means disappointing this young man’s mother. Let them both know that while you care about them a lot, you’re not ready for big promises. At 19, you need to know more about yourself. There’s no getting around the fact that you want to break up.

– Meredith

Readers? Should she listen to her gut or his mom?

Breakups 🖤