Hi Meredith,

I just got out of a relationship few months ago. I have a history of having short relationships where after two or three months, guys lose interest and ghost. I think I started to develop trust issues. I will freak out if any relationship actually goes beyond three months, and tend to mess everything up myself with fights about nothing.

My ex of seven months was different. Or so I thought. We got along really well. We have a lot in common and our differences weren’t deal-breakers. Right at the beginning, he told me he wanted to be serious. We met each other’s friends and parents. He put up with all my insecurities and acting out. He made me feel like I deserved this kind of love. We would have minor fights/arguments here and there, but always worked it out together.

But this last time we fought, we didn’t talk for two days. I started the fight so I apologized, but he did not seem to be able to forgive me. He told me I gave him the silent treatment and that it meant I did not respect the relationship. We broke up on New Year’s Eve. I’m still sad because the way it ended was so stupid. My gut keeps telling me we will get back together. I know we needed a break from each other to become more emotionally stable.

I’ve reached out twice since the breakup. He texted me back in long paragraphs, but it did not seem like he wanted to get back together. It’s been a month since we last talked, and with all the social distancing going on, he still has work. I am worried. I just want to tell him to take care, but I feel like I don’t have the right to do that. How much should you trust your gut when you want to reach out?

– Sabotage