He left me for his admin

Send your own anonymous relationship, dating, and friendship questions to [email protected] or fill out this form.

Q.

After I was married, he was attentive, sweet, and kind. 

However, a ring doesn’t guarantee he won’t CHEAT ON YOU! 

After my second child turned two, he would stay out late saying he was “working” (I was the stay-at-home mom) and then … she came to our house for a party. 

She was younger, prettier, had no kids, and supported his team as an admin. She drank my booze, ate my food, and then took my husband. There is NO guarantee a marriage equals loyalty.

How do I consider love again when I know promises can be so easily broken?

– Broken

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A.

Let’s remember who did the leaving here. Yes, a woman ate your food, drank that booze, and is now with your husband, but he’s the one who walked away.

I’m not defending the other woman, only reminding you she isn’t all powerful. He‘s the guy who made the promises.

Another point: you are not required to seek love again, especially if all of this happened recently. It’s a great time to build friendships and community – to find people who can make you laugh, think of you and your children, and to do fun things with you when your husband has his own quality time with the kids (hopefully that happens a lot). 

Over time, you might find you trust more people, in general. You’ll get to know them and their friends, and find out bad stuff happened to them, too. You’ll start to realize that some people are worth a risk – because they are kind.

But it takes time. 

If it’s been years and you still cant see love as an option, start the community thing all over again. That’s love, too. It’s just as important.

– Meredith

Readers? How do you get over betrayal? What would you tell this letter writer about how to find happiness after this kind of affair?

Send your own relationship and dating questions to [email protected] or fill out this form.

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