Hi Meredith,

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 10 years. We are both in our late 20s. For the past few years, he has constantly gone out with his friends on his day off, even though we can only see each other once a week. Things would get so bad that we would call it off and he would go talk to some other girl during this “break,” which always seems to happen around summer or December. He would always come asking for me to take him back and work on our relationship. Then he would be loving and we would be great – until the cycle started again.

Recently, I asked him to move in with me, and he is having a difficult time agreeing to the idea. I am more financially stable so I live on my own and he still lives with his parents. He was working on getting a better paying job but that seems to take last priority right now along with our relationship. We’re obviously going through the cycle again, but this time feels different. Our temporary break up lasted two months. We’ve been trying to make it work, but I can see that he still can’t commit. It doesn’t help that all his best friends are single.

I really love him and I know he loves me too, but since we started dating at a young age (18 years old) I know he wonders what life would be like if he wasn’t in a serious relationship. When do I walk away? I’m completely fine with him going out with his friends, but I just want to feel like I’m still a priority. I know I deserve better than how he’s been treating me, but is there any way to save our relationship or should I just call it quits? I’ve invested so much and I know that shouldn’t be a reason to stay, but I do still really love him. He tells me that when he imagines his future it’s with me, but I’m afraid of getting hurt again. Were obviously getting older and we do talk about marriage, but I don’t want to get married until our finances are in order and we figure this out. I don’t know what to do.

– Time to Let Go?