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Terminator Truthers: Kyle Reese Will Never Stop Trying To Have Sex With Sarah Connor

ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER stars as The Terminator in'Terminator 2: Judgement Day,' the director James Cameron's 1991 sequel to his 1984 film 'The Terminator.'PHOTOCREDIT--Artisan Home Entertainment --Original IPTC Information: Caption: ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER stars as The Terminator in'Terminator 2: Judgement Day,' the director James Cameron's 1991 sequel to his 1984 film 'The Terminator.' PHOTOCREDIT--Artisan Home Entertainment Published in NYTimes 08/18/00 Weekeend section Published caption: Arnold Schwarzenegger in ''Terminator 2: Judgment Day,'' being released in a special DVD edition with added scenes and other extras. (Artisan Home Entertainment) termtime Library Tag 05172009 Arts & Entertainment

By Victor Paul Alvarez

1 minute to read

In the future, the machines will become self-aware. They will create nigh invulnerable cyborgs to enslave us. They will build time travel machines to prevent our resistance.

And they will have a hard time dealing with pants. It’s true. These super computers can’t figure out how to send a man through time while also allowing him to keep his pants on. Such is the Terminator mythology, pieced together through four films over the course of decades. The trailer for the latest film, “Terminator: Genisys,’’ took the franchise’s already vertigo-inducing time travel narrative and twisted it beyond comprehension.

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Thankfully, Auralnauts created a “Paradox Edition’’ of the trailer that bends time back into common sense and leaves us with one simple truth: Kyle Reese will never stop trying to have sex with Sarah Connor.

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