Sign up for the Today newsletter
Get everything you need to know to start your day, delivered right to your inbox every morning.
4 tips to make New Year’s resolutions stick, according to readers and an expert
As 2025 approaches, many people will make New Year's resolutions. Here's how to set goals that are achievable.
As the new year approaches, many people begin reflecting on their lives, identifying areas they’d like to improve, and setting resolutions to make those changes. But how can you set goals that are not only achievable but also meaningful?
Dr. Ashwini Nadkarni, a psychiatrist at Brigham and Women’s Hospital and an assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, spoke to Boston.com about how to approach New Year’s resolutions. She gave advice about ways to enhances mental well-being, foster self-compassion, and increase the likelihood of success.
Ahead Dr. Nadkarni shares her tips for making and keeping New Year’s resolutions, and see how Boston.com readers manage their resolutions.
Make resolutions for yourself, not for others
Nadkarni emphasizes the importance of setting resolutions that are aligned with personal values, rather than external pressures.
Advertisement:
“The key is to make sure that your resolution is for you, not for others,” she said. “We are relational creatures, and often judge ourselves relative to others, but there’s a difference between social comparison and our individual values.”
She encourages people to take time to reflect on what matters most to them, and make goals that reflect their values.
“People have to decide what’s important to them, reflect on that, and ensure that those resolutions are just for them. The key is to set a goal that resonates with you and means something to you – because that’s what’s going to sustain your motivation to keep doing it,” she said.
Approach goals S-M-A-R-T-ly
One of the most effective ways to ensure success with New Year’s resolutions is to use the S-M-A-R-T goal framework – goals that are Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-bound, according to Nadkarni. The framework comes from the business world, where it is often used in business plan strategies.
Advertisement:
“SMART goals are realistic, attainable, and measurable. This makes them more likely to be achieved,” she said.
For example, if your goal is to lose weight, Nadkarni suggests breaking it down into smaller milestones. “Maybe in a week, I’m going to cut down on a few calories,” she offered as an example. This approach allows for a sense of achievement in the short term while keeping the larger goal in view.
Another important aspect of the SMART approach is pacing. “It’s not just about setting a big goal, but about pacing yourself in terms of achieving it,” Nadkarni said. By setting realistic expectations and creating milestones, you set yourself up for consistent progress.
Let go of ‘all or nothing’ thinking
Nadkarni warned against falling into the trap of “all or nothing” thinking when it comes to resolutions. In cognitive behavioral therapy, this type of mindset is called a “cognitive distortion,” and it can lead to feelings of failure or defeat when one setback occurs.
A common example of all-or-nothing thinking is when people experience a small setback, like indulging in a piece of cake while trying to lose weight, and think, “It’s all over now.” However, Nadkarni urges people to first recognize this way of thinking, anticipate the challenges you might encounter while working on your goal, and then problem-solve them as they arise.
Advertisement:
“Implement that sense of self compassion. Recognize that we all take a few steps forward, a couple steps back. But it doesn’t keep you from necessarily reaching your goal, because success isn’t dichotomous. It’s somewhere in between,” she said.
Collaborate with others
In a world that often prizes individual achievement, Nadkarni highlighted the importance of collaboration in pursuing resolutions.
“We tend to have a very individualized approach to everything in life, particularly in Western society,” she said. She encouraged people to involve others in their resolution journeys, whether by sharing goals with a friend or joining a group that shares similar aspirations.
“Partnering up with people really sustains motivation and the ability to work through setbacks.”
Engaging in a sense of community can provide accountability, emotional support, and encouragement, too.
“If you can engage in a sense of community about resolutions, that’s a fantastic opportunity,” she said. By sharing your journey with others, you not only increase your chances of success but also foster deeper connections.
Below, Boston.com readers share how they set and keep New Year’s resolutions.
Responses have been lightly edited for grammar and clarity.
How do you motivate yourself to keep your resolutions?
“By not giving up the first time I fail. Every time you fail, you pick yourself up, take what you’ve learned, and try again. Eventually you catch on. Nothing new succeeds on the first attempt. Even [Albert] Einstein didn’t get relativity right until his second attempt.” – Mike, Saugus
“I am 67 years old and have not really been anywhere outside Boston. After a recent trip to the Grand Canyon I feel like I am missing out on so much. Indeed travel can awaken one’s mind and soul. My New Year’s resolution is to travel more, a lot more. I put many destination photos in my bedroom, kitchen, and even in the bathroom to motivate myself to travel more.” – Mary, Newton
“I like to make smaller resolutions that are easy to maintain. Set a low bar and you are likely to exceed it. Consistency is the number one predictor of success and zeros kill averages. Set it small and win everyday. Next step, measure it, put that calendar in your kitchen to track your progress.” – Anonymous reader, Coolidge Corner, Brookline
“Haven’t had much luck. Lack of a real plan to succeed.” – Nancy, Cape Cod
“I bury my head in the sand.” – Richie, Worcester
Boston.com occasionally interacts with readers by conducting informal polls and surveys. These results should be read as an unscientific gauge of readers’ opinion.
To comment, please create a screen name in your profile
To comment, please verify your email address
Conversation
This discussion has ended. Please join elsewhere on Boston.com